Did You Ever Wonder.............

How do you get holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
How does a spoiled rich girl change a lightbulb? She says,"Daddy, I want new apartment."
What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? "Dam".
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids.
What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho Cheese.
What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.
What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand? Quatro sinko.
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a skin doctor? A pachydermatologist.
What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, would kill you? A pool table.
What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an "A" bra.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.
Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly sheep.
Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? They all have phones.
Why do bagpipers walk when they play? They're trying to get away from the noise.
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers