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Saturday, December 02, 2006

How About A Santa Lady?



Have been hearing rumors that Santa may be retiring after Christmas. Seems the only likely candidate to take his place should be female.Think about it- women always make lists and seldom if ever have to check them twice.Heck many times they don't even need to go by lists, would rather make things up as they go.As for the naughty or nice part, all a woman has to do is give the bad kids that naughty face (you all know the look I am talking about).And believe you me they will think again before they do anymore bad stuff.I know ,because my own mom had that look.
Females also have eyes in the back of their heads, women go to beauty shops not just to look pretty, but to cover up those eyes.
Then comes the workplace. The elves will no longer have to wear those green felt clothes ,nor those ugly green shoes with the turned up toes. After all how many people have you seen with toes that go up at a 90 degree angle? It's inhumane I tell you!! The bells need to go also, they must get on the little guys nerves with all that ting-a-ling with each step. A woman will also have bubble baths galore,aromatherapy candles, and home-made desserts for all the workers.

Last but not least, the reindeer will be fed all the fruitcake their little hooves can handle, just not after December 16th. Fruitcakes are heavy and may interfere with the takeoff.
Now. Just one question. What color yarn shall I use for the reindeer"s sweaters? On Mavis, on Dixie,on Shelby and Maizeey,Connie, Laura,Susie, and Daisy. To the top of Wal-mart to the shops at the mall, just dash away, dash away, dash away all.

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